Working through separation anxiety does take time. A lot of time. But when is it time to look at other potential contributing factors or ways you could do things differently?
On your separation anxiety journey you will experience regressions, and you will most likely at least once feel that your dog will never be able to be cope being left longer than a certain amount of time. And that is normal, to be expected, and if addressed correctly you will overcome those little obstacles.
However, there are times when it is time to take a step back and ensure there is nothing else that is inhibiting progress for your dog.
Undiagnosed Pain (this is a big one!)
This is an important one Im afraid! Please be very aware that just because your dog is not limping, or yelping in pain, and is still playful and enjoying walks and running around, that does NOT mean they are not experiencing pain. According to Canine Arthritis Management (an excellent one to follow by the way, regardless if you do or dont (knowingly!) have a dog with arthritis), once a dog is at the point where they are starting to limp, they are already at a 6/10 on the pain scale.
D. Mills et al (2020) estimated that as much as 82% of dogs who were seen for behaviour concerns had undiagnosed pain.
Let’s take me as an example. I have awful knees. Like…awful! There is no cartilage in the patellofemoral joints on both joints, and therefore I already have osteoarthritis. I have chronic pain and discomfort all the time (chronic pain is pain that has been there a long time, acute pain is the sudden, more intense pain you get after, say, an injury that is more short lived), but the likelyhood is most people wouldnt know I am in pain unless they flare up, in which case I DO walk strangely, and on occasions have had to use crutches for a few weeks. I can tell you, when they flare up it is is very very painful…..until they flare up they are always at best, very uncomfortable, even though on the outside I am not limping (hence why if you ever see me, I am always shifting positions, and cant stand up for ages). And my knees do affect my behaviour….some days more than others, but my tolerance and fuse with those closest to me can be shorter at times due to the pain. It is exactly the same with our dogs!
If your dog is in pain, it will 100% impact their ability to progress on a separation anxiety protocol. No doubt about it. And very often pain is not easy to spot, and is often missed at vet check ups….vets are not psychic and in a 10 minute consult where the dog is likely to be either fearful, anxious, hyped up and where behaviour and gait can be masked, it is near impossible for them to spot everything in that time. The best way to start with is to get an in depth gait and posture analysis done – the way a dog holds themselves and moves tells us SO much about if that dog is feeling discomfort anywhere, and I have sent so many clients back to the vet now with observations made from photos and videos and, sure enough, underlying pain has been identified. This is why I am currently training to be a Dynamic Dog Practitioner, so I can easily spot signs of pain and discomfort so that can be addressed sooner rather than later.
So, while variation is very normal on a separation anxiety protocol, if you are making very little progress at all, or your dog has occasional “good” days but they are few and far between, or there are multiple inconsistencies and there are no visible patterns or causes, then please do not discount pain. Once the pain is under control your dog will most likely be able to forge forward with their absences!
Discounting medication
Karen Overall (2014) states that “medication is almost always an essential part of treatment of clinical separation anxiety”.
However, medication is not a magic wand and should always be given alongside behavior modification. Karen Overall (2014) also found that “dogs treated with medication acquire the behavior modification more quickly”.
So those two quotes say it all dont they. Behavioural medication should not be seen as a ‘failure’ or a ‘last resort’….if we were struggling with a mental or physical health concern and the doctor suggested medication, we wouldnt refuse it now would we? So why do we sometimes feel reluctant to use medication to help our dogs? I get it, I do……but please believe me when I say I have lost count of the number of clients who, when they have finally decided to put their dogs on medication (after discussions with myself AND the vet of course), see much more consistent and significant improvements to their separation anxiety protocol.
So if you are feeling like you are hitting a brick wall time and time again, please dont discount medication!
Misunderstanding your dog’s body language
Dog’s body language can be super hard to read – I do appreciate that! And, to make it even harder, all dogs are very different in the body language they use to convey discomfort or anxiety! While one dog may immediately start whining and barking as soon as they become anxious when you leave, another dog may be quiet, but may be panting, or sniffing around the hallway, or scratching themselves, or standing in the hallway stiff, occasionally shifting weight on their hind or front limbs, or pacing around the house and unable to settle for long. Just because a dog is not vocalising, or destroying the furniture when alone, or toileting out of anxiety, it does NOT mean they are not just as anxious…..they just display it in different ways.
One of the MOST vital parts of a successful separation anxiety protocol is it being relevant to YOUR dog, therefore knowing how YOUR dog communicates is so important. We need to be aware of the more subtle stress signs your dog uses, BEFORE they reach anxiety and the point where they may start to vocalise, because if you wait outside until they are already anxious, its too late, and they wont be able to learn that absences are safe.
So be sure to learn about body language, and specifically YOUR dog’s body language. This is often why people find doing a separation anxiety protocol on their own so difficult, because this truly cannot be a case of “one size fits all”!
Not truly assessing your dog’s threshold
What I mean by this is identifying at what point your dog starts to become concerned (ie is this when you start to get shoes on, pick up keys, or do they remain relaxing until they hear or see the front door open?), and then also assessing how quickly your dog escalates from mild discomfort up to anxiety and panic. Some dogs escalate very fast, whilst some dogs will escalate to anxiety more slowly.
It is vital to know this information about YOUR individual dog….and this is why generic advice simply does not work. One dog may genuinely be comfortable for 5 minutes after their humans leave the house, but after that will start to show signs of stress which may gradually escalate…..whilst for other dogs, 5 minutes is far far too long! We need to be setting controlled absences to end either when your dog is still very comfortable OR at the very first signs of MILD discomfort…..more frequently the former!
Always increasing duration & criteria
If you are approaching your separation anxiety protocol by always increasing time out of the door unless your dog really struggles, then this could be the problem. Adopting that “steady increase” route seems sensible to us humans – if the dog copes fine with 5 minutes, of course he will be able to cope with 6 minutes, then 8 minutes etc, right? Not necessarily!
Remember that dogs are living beings like us, and what they can cope with, and how they feel on a day to day basis will vary, just like us.
Dogs recognise patterns very easily…..in terms of behaviour modification, if your dog notices that every time you leave via the front door it is always longer than it was before, this will highly likely affect their tolerance and what they can cope with.
Easy wins are SO important – so even if your dog has just smashed an absence of 10 minutes, for example, then throw in an absence of 1 or 2 minutes the day after! It may seem counter intuitive but it really is not…it will help build your dog’s confidence around alone time!
Using confinement
Despite the generic advice freely available online, crating your dog (or even having them in a pen or behind a gate) can be problematic and blur the lines of what we are seeing with a dog with separation anxiety. Usually dogs who have anxiety about being alone, also have anxiety about being confined, and therefore we cant be sure how much of the behaviours we see are due to anxiety about being alone or confined.
Also, it is always better to allow your dog access to the places they would choose to go to relax during the day…..if they dont love their crate and dont go into it unless you ask them to go in, then this can also become another pre-departure cue (ie it can start to predict to them that you are about to leave, and therefore start to elevate their anxiety).
Plus, from a more ethical point of view, I prefer dogs to be able to move around as and when they wish to do so, and change resting positions and locations if they want.
It is better to shut your dog OUT of rooms you dont want them to go into rather than shut them IN (but be sure to close doors to those rooms a good amount of time prior to leaving so that, again, it doesnt become a pre-departure cue!).
Not tracking data
There are potentially SO many variables that can affect how a dog copes with absences! Below are a few of them (and there will be many, many more that are specific to each individual dog and their life:
- Time of day
- Which humans are involved in the session
- How much exercise the dog has had prior…and what type of exercise that was
- Whether the dog has been to daycare or with a dog walker that day
- Weather
- Any particularly stressful events that day/vet visits/groomers visit etc
- The dog not feeling well
- Stressors in the environment (barking at next door’s dogs through the fence, building work going on next door etc)
If you are not tracking data on each and every one of your sessions, you simply will not recognise if there is any pattern, and therefore will be unable to adapt accordingly.
The dog’s needs are not being met
In order to be successful on a separation anxiety protocol (in fact with any behaviour modification plan) the dog’s needs MUST be being met. That means we should ask ourselves the following questions:-
- Has the dog had sufficient physical exercise? (what is “sufficient” will depend on your dog, their breed or breed mix, their age, health etc, but each dog must have their individual needs met)
- Has the dog had sufficient mental stimulation and enrichment? Just going on 1 or 2 walks a day is not sufficient for a lot of dogs. Look at what your dog may be bred for. Cockapoos are popular, and they are a mix of cocker spaniels and poodles – both originally bred for hunting, both high energy, both highly intelligent. They need a LOT of physical exercise and mental stimulation, and if they are not getting it then it will be likely to inhibit progress with their separation anxiety
- Are they hungry? If you do your separation anxiety steps around the time your dog is due to have a meal, or is hungry, then they will likely struggle more because of this.
- Do they need to go out to the toilet?
- Are they getting enough attention from you? If the dog is being ignored all day while you work, we can likely expect them to be wanting to have attention from us when work finishes (dogs are highly social animals remember), so this could impact their progress too.
So if you feel you are not getting anywhere with your separation anxiety protocol, take a step back and identify if there is something else in your dog’s life that is inhibiting progress.
If you would like help working through your dog’s separation anxiety please get in touch! If you complete the form on the page linked below, I will be in touch to arrange an initial call to have a chat: Remote Online Separation Anxiety Dog Training (politepawsdogtraining.co.uk)
